Month: January 2025

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Progress continues with Brian Jost’s unfinished 2004 song “I Guess I Will.”

For more music, blog posts, and other info, please visit:

• https://forcingsmiles.com/music
• https://EurekaPointLighthouse.com/
• https://www.inthemic.com/

Read or listen to Brian Jost’s memoir: “Grounded by Bipolar Disorder; One Pilot’s Landing” (available in print, e-book/kindle, and audiobook). Click HERE to find the book on Amazon and Audible.

Episode 19 intro recorded:  01/09/2025

All music, lyrics, and recordings by Forcing Smiles / Brian Jost.

SUICIDE AND CRISIS HOTLINE (phone) – Dial 988.  More info:  https://988lifeline.org/

Mental health resource (education, support, advocacy, public awareness):  NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness:  https://nami.org/

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 20:05 — 18.4MB) | Embed

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New song parts captured for “I Guess I Will.” Zoom H2n MP3 64k (about 15 minutes), then WAV 48k/24b (about last 3 minutes). Note… the Wav was up front before intro on separate track with a bit of chorus and reverb.

For more music, blog posts, and other info, please visit:

• https://forcingsmiles.com/music
• https://EurekaPointLighthouse.com/
• https://www.inthemic.com/

Read or listen to Brian Jost’s memoir: “Grounded by Bipolar Disorder; One Pilot’s Landing” (available in print, e-book/kindle, and audiobook). Click HERE to find the book on Amazon and Audible.

Episode 19 intro recorded:  01/09/2025

All music, lyrics, and recordings by Forcing Smiles / Brian Jost.

SUICIDE AND CRISIS HOTLINE (phone) – Dial 988.  More info:  https://988lifeline.org/

Mental health resource (education, support, advocacy, public awareness):  NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness:  https://nami.org/

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 32:31 — 29.8MB) | Embed

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Brian Jost practices piano and tries to re-learn “I Guess I will” as his kids get ready to leave for school.

For more music, blog posts, and other info, please visit:

• https://forcingsmiles.com/music
• https://EurekaPointLighthouse.com/
• https://www.inthemic.com/

Read or listen to Brian Jost’s memoir: “Grounded by Bipolar Disorder; One Pilot’s Landing” (available in print, e-book/kindle, and audiobook). Click HERE to find the book on Amazon and Audible.

Episode 19 intro recorded:  01/09/2025

All music, lyrics, and recordings by Forcing Smiles / Brian Jost.

SUICIDE AND CRISIS HOTLINE (phone) – Dial 988.  More info:  https://988lifeline.org/

Mental health resource (education, support, advocacy, public awareness):  NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness:  https://nami.org/

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 4:26 — 8.1MB) | Embed

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This version (Cloverleaf Mix) of “I Am Afraid” (written January 2009 by Forcing Smiles/Brian Jost) was performed and recorded in March 2024 by Brian Jost partially at Cloverleaf Audio-Visual in St. Paul, MN, and was mixed and mastered by Matt Ebso (Cloverleaf owner).

For more music, blog posts, and other info, please visit:

• https://forcingsmiles.com/music
• https://EurekaPointLighthouse.com/
• https://www.inthemic.com/

Read or listen to Brian Jost’s memoir: “Grounded by Bipolar Disorder; One Pilot’s Landing” (available in print, e-book/kindle, and audiobook). Click HERE to find the book on Amazon and Audible.

Episode 19 intro recorded:  01/09/2025

All music, lyrics, and recordings by Forcing Smiles / Brian Jost.

SUICIDE AND CRISIS HOTLINE (phone) – Dial 988.  More info:  https://988lifeline.org/

Mental health resource (education, support, advocacy, public awareness):  NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness:  https://nami.org/

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:56:34 — 106.7MB) | Embed

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Continuation of episodes 15 and 17. Brian works on his recently rediscovered 20+ year-old song, “I Guess I Will,” written and originally recorded in the later part of 2004 while living in a cabin rental in Barnum, MN, when I was working in Duluth, between living in Portland, Oregon, and Vancouver, Washington.

For more music, blog posts, and other info, please visit:

• https://forcingsmiles.com/music
• https://EurekaPointLighthouse.com/
• https://www.inthemic.com/

Read or listen to Brian Jost’s memoir: “Grounded by Bipolar Disorder; One Pilot’s Landing” (available in print, e-book/kindle, and audiobook). Click HERE to find the book on Amazon and Audible.

Episode 18 recorded:  01/08/2025

All music, lyrics, and recordings by Forcing Smiles / Brian Jost.

SUICIDE AND CRISIS HOTLINE (phone) – Dial 988.  More info:  https://988lifeline.org/

Mental health resource (education, support, advocacy, public awareness):  NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness:  https://nami.org/

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 42:47 — 39.2MB) | Embed

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Brian works on his recently rediscovered 20+ year-old song, “I Guess I Will,” written and originally recorded in the later part of 2004 while living in a cabin rental in Barnum, MN, when I was working in Duluth, between living in Portland, Oregon, and Vancouver, Washington.

For more music, blog posts, and other info, please visit:

• https://forcingsmiles.com/music
• https://EurekaPointLighthouse.com/
• https://www.inthemic.com/

Read or listen to Brian Jost’s memoir: “Grounded by Bipolar Disorder; One Pilot’s Landing” (available in print, e-book/kindle, and audiobook). Click HERE to find the book on Amazon and Audible.

Episode 17 recorded:  01/07/2025

All music, lyrics, and recordings by Forcing Smiles / Brian Jost.

SUICIDE AND CRISIS HOTLINE (phone) – Dial 988.  More info:  https://988lifeline.org/

Mental health resource (education, support, advocacy, public awareness):  NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness:  https://nami.org/

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“Devil Said” was written and recorded by Brian Jost (Forcing Smiles) likely towards the end of 2004 (no later than December 2004) while Brian was living in a cabin in Barnum, MN, when he was working in Duluth, between living in Portland, Oregon, and Vancouver, Washington.

Brian plans on re-recording “Devil Said”  for his 2nd album “Letting Barnum Be,” before releasing album #3, “The Other Side.”

For more music, blog posts, and other info, please visit:

• https://forcingsmiles.com/music
• https://EurekaPointLighthouse.com/
• https://www.inthemic.com/

Read or listen to Brian Jost’s memoir: “Grounded by Bipolar Disorder; One Pilot’s Landing” (available in print, e-book/kindle, and audiobook). Click HERE to find the book on Amazon and Audible.

Conversation between Brian, Jimmy, Bob, and Carl recorded:  01/06/2025

All music, lyrics, and recordings by Forcing Smiles / Brian Jost.

SUICIDE AND CRISIS HOTLINE (phone) – Dial 988.  More info:  https://988lifeline.org/

Mental health resource (education, support, advocacy, public awareness):  NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness:  https://nami.org/

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 6:20 — 11.6MB) | Embed

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This song, “I Guess I Will,” was written and recorded in the later part of 2004 while living in a cabin rental in Barnum, MN, when I was working in Duluth, between living in Portland, Oregon, and Vancouver, Washington.

I plan on re-recording “I Guess I Will”  for my 2nd album “Letting Barnum Be,” Before moving on to album #3, “The Other Side.”

For more music, blog posts, and other info, please visit:

• https://forcingsmiles.com/music
• https://EurekaPointLighthouse.com/
• https://www.inthemic.com/

Read or listen to Brian Jost’s memoir: “Grounded by Bipolar Disorder; One Pilot’s Landing” (available in print, e-book/kindle, and audiobook). Click HERE to find the book on Amazon and Audible.

Conversation recorded:  01/05/2025

All music, lyrics, and recordings by Forcing Smiles / Brian Jost.

SUICIDE AND CRISIS HOTLINE (phone) – Dial 988.  More info:  https://988lifeline.org/

Mental health resource (education, support, advocacy, public awareness):  NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness:  https://nami.org/

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 14:13 — 13.0MB) | Embed

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I found a bunch of music I wrote and recorded in 2004 while living in a cabin rental in Barnum, MN, when I was working in Duluth, between living in Portland, Oregon, and Vancouver, Washington. This music is from a very difficult and important time of my life. I feel decided that I will re-record much of this 20+ year old music as album 2, titled “Letting Barnum Be.” We’ll see if I follow through with that idea.

Song idea title: “Lazy Show” (written 9/10/2024) by Forcing Smiles (Brian Jost), copyright 2024. Song recorded 9/10/2024 on Zoom H2n.

For more music, blog posts, and other info, please visit

• https://forcingsmiles.com/music
• https://EurekaPointLighthouse.com/
• https://www.inthemic.com/

Read or listen to Brian Jost’s memoir: “Grounded by Bipolar Disorder; One Pilot’s Landing” (available in print, e-book/kindle, and audiobook). Click HERE to find the book on Amazon and Audible.

Conversation recorded:  01/05/2025

All music, lyrics, and recordings by Forcing Smiles / Brian Jost.

SUICIDE AND CRISIS HOTLINE (phone) – Dial 988.  More info:  https://988lifeline.org/

Mental health resource (education, support, advocacy, public awareness):  NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness:  https://nami.org/

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 59:32 — 54.5MB) | Embed

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Don’t waste your time listening to this.

Song title: “Jingle Jangle” or maybe “Jingle Jangle Smack” (written Sept. 2024) by Forcing Smiles (Brian Jost), copyright 2024.

For more music, blog posts, and other info, please visit

• https://forcingsmiles.com/music
• https://EurekaPointLighthouse.com/
• https://www.inthemic.com/

Read or listen to Brian Jost’s memoir: “Grounded by Bipolar Disorder; One Pilot’s Landing” (available in print, e-book/kindle, and audiobook). Click HERE to find the book on Amazon and Audible.

Conversation recorded:  01/03/2025

Final play of song (last few minutes of episode) recorded 9/24/2024.

All music, lyrics, and recordings by Forcing Smiles / Brian Jost.

SUICIDE AND CRISIS HOTLINE (phone) – Dial 988.  More info:  https://988lifeline.org/

Mental health resource (education, support, advocacy, public awareness):  NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness:  https://nami.org/

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 6:00 — 11.0MB) | Embed

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Song title: “Like a River” (written Oct. 20245) by Forcing Smiles (Brian Jost), copyright 2024.

For more music, blog posts, and other info, please visit

• https://forcingsmiles.com/music
• https://EurekaPointLighthouse.com/
• https://www.inthemic.com/

Read or listen to Brian Jost’s memoir: “Grounded by Bipolar Disorder; One Pilot’s Landing” (available in print, e-book/kindle, and audiobook). Click HERE to find the book on Amazon and Audible.

SUICIDE AND CRISIS HOTLINE (phone) – Dial 988.  More info:  https://988lifeline.org/

Mental health resource (education, support, advocacy, public awareness):  NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness:  https://nami.org/

Conversation recorded:  01/02/2025

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 7:21 — 13.5MB) | Embed

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Here’s a feel-good song for the New Year by Forcing Smiles! Something much more positive compared to what I’ve shared in the past.

Title:  BLEEDING OUT

 “I can feel it on the inside. Someone pounding on my shell. Yelling at me to get out now. Telling me to leave my hell…”

All music and lyrics by Brian Jost, aka. Forcing Smiles, copyrighted.

For more music, blog posts, and other info, please visit

• https://forcingsmiles.com/music
• https://EurekaPointLighthouse.com/
• https://www.inthemic.com/

Read or listen to Brian Jost’s memoir: “Grounded by Bipolar Disorder; One Pilot’s Landing” (available in print, e-book/kindle, and audiobook). Click HERE to find the book on Amazon and Audible.

SUICIDE AND CRISIS HOTLINE (phone) – Dial 988.  More info:  https://988lifeline.org/

Mental health resource (education, support, advocacy, public awareness):  NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness:  https://nami.org/

Conversation recorded:  01/01/2025